Tag Archives: year’s end

Out to Space Year Seven: the Hollow

April 2010March 2011

Self-portrait in the pixelated darkness, May 2010
Self-portrait in the pixelated darkness, May 2010

By April 2010, I had been actively blogging on this space for six years. It mostly reflected on the passion about the work I did so far in photography and videos. But after I finishing the school at College of Fine Arts, the big question was what next! My life became vague and the blog became hollow.

Well, I was supposed to make a living as a media artist/producer, wasn’t I? But the harsh reality was that it wasn’t easy. Even though I got a regular casual job as a video editor to live by, my career needed to be more sustainable.

Street photography or multiculturalism didn’t flare up to me anymore. There was a revisit to the urban bird and back yard theme but that wasn’t it. In fact, I hardly picked up the DSLR at all. No concrete new idea for photography.

There was one trivial series on morning toilet paper I drew on it while taking a crap and took a picture of them everyday. (What I did with them after that would be a bit gross to elaborate.) Strangely, it was somehow a part of my dealing with depression.

One moment I was in the zone was chasing shadows of people on the streets and capturing on video. That became my first entry to Kino Sydney. It was well received by the audience and I was pleased. That was it, to make another short film.

That would be about anxiety, yes, and another mental issue. I put my project up for crowd funding. Unfortunately, my heart problem emerged and it was terminated before the campaign due. I had enough. My focus shifted from it to getting back to Bangkok.

So, life in Australia came to an end in December 2010 after nine and half year. While I was flying back to Thailand, I watch the Wizard of Oz on the plane. It was like Dorothy waking up from her dream. I tapped ruby slippers and chanted, “There’s no place like home”. Back then, it seemed bitter when I left but I would not trade the experience there with anything. And this blog was a big part of it.

Luckily, the day before I left, I got phone call to offer me a job in Bangkok. It was an online producer for World Bank in Bangkok Office I applied for six months earlier. The long process of recruitment made me give up this prospect. But it turned out to be such a perfect timing. The question I had for the whole year was answered. I finally had a sustainable job, a decent one.

In the other hand, that affected my time for the blog as well. It would have been filled with posts about the resettlement in Bangkok and my reflection on the native country. However, I could only do it in January 2011. Once the job started, the blog was almost completely ignored and empty.

So, I would this year seven of Out to Space was the beginning of the hollow of the blog, sadly.

Out to Space Year Six: the Intensity

April 2009March 2010

At the basement of my house, directing the final project with classmates at College of Fine Arts, August 2009 Photo: Stilgherrian
At the basement of my house with College of Fine Arts classmates, directing the final project, August 2009 Photo: Stilgherrian

The previous year of Out to Space was a transition to study at College of Fine Arts. Most of the posts in the year six were still about the education that got very intense. It wasn’t just the posts about the compulsory final project, but the subject I chose to do was also about the mental illness I had been dealing with—depression.

The school prepared us for the project in the second semester from the script development to preproduction. Then the final semester, we got to shoot the film and did the postproduction. But what I liked the most about it was that they forced us to report the progress on their student blog. It came handy for me (probably not for other students). And I published those posts later on this blog. It was the only and the most comprehensive behind-the-scene blog series I’ve done. There hasn’t been a chance I’d do something like that again, sadly.

In between semesters, I took another workshop with Metro Screen, Live Streaming Multi-cam course. However, I didn’t blog about the making. Stil has more about it. It was a busy year.

Other than the posts about the school, there was hardly a motivation to go out the shoot photos and I was done with the dump series from the previous years as well as other photo subjects in the early years. And the blog started to fill in with automated weekly tweets.

2009 was also one of the toughest years in my life. I had no income and relied on the dole to live by. The study was really stressful. I had to work on the script about depression that I went to the deep dark place. It was the year that exposed that side of myself the most.

By the end of 2009, the hard work on the project paid off. I pushed the boundary in sound production. The final project finished with the bang and the mental condition slowly recovered. But it was also the end of the long and the first relationship.

By March 2010, I officially graduated but this space didn’t seem to go anywhere. It might have needed a break. Looking back how intense the year was. There were ambitious goals and they archived. What an exhausting learning curve!

Out to Space Year Five: the Transformation

April 2008March 2009

In the first few months of year five, I still played with two main materials: Thailand trip and the street dumps until the study at College of Fine Arts (now, UNSW Art & Design) commenced in July. That changed Out to Space from those photos to the stories about the Master degree. But the photos weren’t wasted. They were transformed to another medium—videos.

Dump of the Day was my fascination of junks on the streets of Sydney and became an obsession. It turned out to be too many of them on the blog. It would have been perfect to post them on instagram these days. (Hey, the gear was Nokia N90 then N96 on Symbian with GPRS. Imagine 2008) However, they turned into the perfect source for assignments in my study. Significantly, in Video Art class, which we had to produce a video loop and a video installation.

Continue reading Out to Space Year Five: the Transformation

Out to Space Year Four: The Explosions

April 2007March 2008

Halo
A partygoer at Sydney’s Mardi Gras Sleaze Ball dance party, September 2007

After some decent exposures in the year three, the blog exploded with number of works and some new directions. The milestones that contributed to it were not just in the blog but also in my personal life.

From the last’s year momentum, I was frustrated with the old content manage system. So I moved to WordPress. The first post rightly went to a photo gallery approach, which somehow reflected on my inner thoughts of a new beginning.

From then on it became the platform that I could write about other stuff such as food, politics, the Internet, and so on. But photography was still the main medium I blog the most. Continue reading Out to Space Year Four: The Explosions

Out to Space Year Three: the Exposures

April 2006March 2007

Self-portrait under Sydney Harbour Bridge, August 2006
Self-portrait under Sydney Harbour Bridge, August 2006

There were a lot going on in the year three of Out to Space. Even though, the momentum of year two was slow, toward the end of the year, my photography started to get some significant exposures.

The first three months from April to June, I still was into cityscape and urban wildlife. They seemed slightly repetitive for me. So I took a photography course at Australian Centre of Photography (ACP) to stretch my skills and perspective. Some professional and constructive criticism could do some good. My most satisfied comment was from a classmate that compared my self-portrait to Jeffrey Smart.

During that time, the restaurant I was working at was closed for renovation. I took the chance to give a go fully on my photography venture. I set up a couple of stock photo account as passive income. I travelled to Melbourne to explore another city with the photographic eyes.

Continue reading Out to Space Year Three: the Exposures